
'LinkedIn. Is. Not. A. Dating. Site': Should People Be Trying to Find Love on LinkedIn?
Ben Bergman is the newsroom's senior reporter, covering venture capital. Previously he was a senior business reporter and host at KPCC, a senior producer at Gimlet Media, a producer at NPR's Morning Edition, and produced two investigative documentaries for KCET. He has been a frequent on-air contributor to business coverage on NPR and Marketplace and has written for The New York Times and Columbia Journalism Review. Ben was a 2017-2018 Knight-Bagehot Fellow in Economic and Business Journalism at Columbia Business School. In his free time, he enjoys skiing, playing poker, and cheering on The Seattle Seahawks. Follow him on Twitter.
When Anna Ivey, CEO and co-founder of CommonCoach Inc., opened her inbox recently she noticed an email from someone who had connected with her on LinkedIn, but she soon found out he was not looking for a professional connection.
"Your beauty and charming smile caught my eye," the man wrote. "You have an amazing profile and glad I had the courage to write you after weeks of deep thought." He then added: "I hope no offense is taken."
Ivey did take offense and posted a screenshot of the offending email to Twitter with the message: "LinkedIn. Is. Not. A. Dating. Site."
"I decided I'm going to start putting these out there, because especially in the startup world, a lot of men don't realize the garbage that women have to put up with," she said in a telephone interview.
Women – and to a much lesser degree, men – have long had to endure unwanted advances in the workplace or at work related events. But the problem is worse on LinkedIn, where people feel more comfortable making advances than they would in-person.
"It would be nice if these platforms took this abuse more seriously," said Ivey.
LinkedIn's community guidelines prohibit "romantic advances." However, as the company's CEO Jeff Weiner told Wired magazine last year, it relies on self-policing to enforce the policy. The company says it removed 52,617 instances of harassment or adult content last year.
Los Angeles has always had a reputation as a tough place to date, and that before COVID-19 shut down bars, parties and workplaces. As internet dating has become more mainstream, especially during the pandemic, people are used to finding love online, and unlike dating apps — where the person you're swiping on might not even be real — LinkedIn confers authenticity. That it is not a dating site is a feature and not a bug for some users wary of being seen on the likes of Bumble or Hinge.
"People don't want their friend's daughter or their assistant to see them online," said eharmony dating coach Laurel House. "They don't want people knowing their personal business."
Photo by Greg Bulla on Unsplash
'Sometimes It Does Feel Predatory'
Ivey estimates she gets about one message a month through LinkedIn asking her out and she sees it is as more than just an annoyance. "Sometimes it does feel predatory," she added. "I haven't asked to be a target. I don't know how much they know about me. I don't know how much they have Google stalked me."
Despite the unwelcome advances, Ivey says she cannot delete her LinkedIn profile because it is an important networking tool. She tries to limit how much information she shares in her profile, something she says men do not have to worry about. Some women have also been told to use less attractive profile photos.
"I really mean that Linkedin is not a dating site," Ivey said. "If I were looking for romantic prospects, I would not be looking at Linkedin."
Ivey is hardly alone. Olivia Solon, tech investigations editor for NBC News, got this message: "It's my pleasure meeting you here. You look so beautiful and gorgeous." Kim Taylor, CEO of Cluster, posted a screenshot of a similar entreaty on Twitter: "I've not been able to take my eyes off your picture," a man wrote to her. "You're the most beautiful I've ever seen."
After Taylor posted the message, Ben Katz, a tech entrepreneur who's currently the executive chairman of Haven Coliving, criticized her on Twitter for being overly sensitive.
"The outreach wasn't hostile," Katz replied to her. "Has anyone ever hit on you at a work event? How is this different?" (Katz later deleted the Tweets. When asked to comment he replied "LOL.")
The exchange highlights not only two divergent point of views, but how — three years after the #MeToo movement began — there is still confusion about when making a pass at someone crosses the line. Even when intentionally looking for love on apps, women tend to experience sexual harassment at a much higher rate than men.
Unclear intentions: An Informational Interview or a Date?
Two years ago, Saphira Howell, who was 20-years-old at the time, was working in an entry-level role at a tech startup in Venice when she received a LinkedIn message from a man seven years her senior. He asked if they could meet over coffee for an informational interview so he could learn more about the company. Since they had mutual acquaintances on LinkedIn, she agreed. But when they met near Venice Beach, he showed little interest in talking about work.
"I thought it was weird because he didn't ask anything about the company," Howell recalls. "I thought maybe this guy was just a big networker?"
When the man texted a few weeks later asking if she wanted to have lunch, Howell asked him if he was looking for a date. He said he was. Howell told him she had a boyfriend and was not interested. She never heard from the man again. "I was a little unsettled that he thought our informational coffee was a date," she said.
Laurel House, the dating coach expert at eharmony, said stories like Howell's are common, but she does not think it is inappropriate to use LinkedIn for dating, so long as people are respectful and upfront with their intentions.
"Make it clear as you can that you're interested in knowing her in a non-business way," said House. "You're giving her the opportunity to say 'thanks, but no thanks'."
House says overtures on the app are often a two-way street. "I have a lot of female clients who reach out to men to date on LinkedIn," she added. "They think a guy is really hot and maybe they can get a job or maybe a date."
Steven Ward, CEO of Master Matchmakers, who counts many tech executives as clients, says he scours dating sites for eligible singles, then cross-references LinkedIn to help verify their professional credentials.
"Linkedin is a great reservoir of talent when it comes to the dating scene," he said.
He also uses the platform to message people, since most dating sites require a mutual match before users can communicate. "You take your lumps," said Ward. "But sometimes they start to feel very intrigued if there's no commitment to work with me."
A matchmaker and chief dating officer at Match, Katie Wilson says she has contacted thousands of people on LinkedIn to ask if they would be interested in dating her clients and experiences "ten times" the success she does on Instagram or Facebook.
"I have yet to come across someone that's frustrated that I've reached out to them about their personal lives," said Wilson. "I think everyone is flattered. Even married folks are tickled that they still got it."
Still, Wilson does acknowledge that receiving a message from her is probably less threatening or creepy than getting one from a suitor.
A Message and Then a Marriage
Some have met or reconnected with long lost acquaintances through LinkedIn that led to relationships, or even marriages.
Katie McCulloh, who lives outside Washington D.C, had grown weary of dating apps after years of bad dates. "If there was an app out there, I had tried it," she said. "I never had any success."
Three years ago, when she had just turned 35, she reached out to an old high school boyfriend on LinkedIn who she had not spoken to in years. "Linkedin was the one way I could reconnect," McCulloh said. "I didn't have a phone number and he wasn't on other social media."
McCulloh said she was only trying to be friends, but once the two met up "It didn't take long for us to realize something was still there." Two years ago they got married and now they are raising a toddler.
"You just never know what's going to happen," she said.
Lead art by Candice Navi.
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Los Angeles is home to around 5,000 startups, the majority of which are in their young, formative years.
Which of those thousands are poised for a breakout in 2021? We asked dozens of L.A.'s top VCs to weigh in. We wanted to know which companies they would have invested in if they could go back and do it all over again.
Boiling
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vbWVkaWEucmJsLm1zL2ltYWdlP3U9JTJGaW1hZ2VzJTNGcSUzRHRibiUzQUFOZDlHY1EwRjdlRzlxY3JFd1lNVS12T2VTWng1NFd6VFdWUktaMFpyQSUyNnVzcXAlM0RDQVUmaG89aHR0cHMlM0ElMkYlMkZlbmNyeXB0ZWQtdGJuMC5nc3RhdGljLmNvbSZzPTEwMDImaD1jOGIyM2Y5YWNhNGNhNDY3NzZhNmUzNTU3MWI2YzAzNjcwOTU1Nzg0ODQxZDdiZGIyZjAxMzUxNjdkN2I5NWY2JnNpemU9OTgweCZjPTE2MDM4MjI5MTgiLCJleHBpcmVzX2F0IjoxNjY1MTY5NTcxfQ.iTVRhSe0UulUxSyMUZ4QA7_0njADdWe3QEJ28-xW6m0/img.jpg" id="a03b9" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="03faa4898896a9ce5be09d51dc104b73" alt="Pipe logo" />Pipe
<p><a href="https://www.pipe.com/" target="_blank">Pipe</a> provides financial services to help cloud service companies tap into their deferred cash flows, allowing them to continue growing without taking on debt or giving up ownership. For subscription-based businesses, this makes it "as if all of your customers converted to annual plans overnight," according to the company.</p><p>Founded by Harry Hurst, Josh Mangel and Zain Allarakhia, the company <a href="https://dot.la/pipe-taps-60-million-seed-extension-2646245409.html" data-linked-post="2646245409" target="_blank">raised $66 million of seed funding earlier this year</a> in a deal led by Craft Ventures and Fin Venture Capital.</p>Clash App Inc.
<p>Created by former Vine-r Brendon McNerney and entrepreneur and marketing expert P.J. Leimgruber, <a href="https://www.clashapp.co/" target="_blank">Clash App</a> is a short form video platform similar to TikTok, but without built-in sound libraries. It's geared toward empowering creators with innovative monetization options and inclusive communities.</p>XCLAIM
<p><a href="https://www.x-claim.com/" target="_blank">XCLAIM</a> has created an electronic platform where bankruptcy claims that take a notoriously long time to process can be digitally traded. Founded in 2018 by Matthew Sedigh, who has operated in the corporate restructuring field for more than a decade, the company says "rather than wait years for the bankruptcy court process to issue payment distributions, creditors can now access immediate liquidity by selling their claim to interested buyers." Earlier this year, it raised a $4 million seed round led from Luma Launch, First Round Capital and Freestyle Capital.</p>Simmering
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vbWVkaWEucmJsLm1zL2ltYWdlP3U9JTJGaW1hZ2VzJTNGcSUzRHRibiUzQUFOZDlHY1JlR3QzLWlHSmFtYVJnLXNwSXVYcDc5N0xOdnpTYWhYYVloQSUyNnVzcXAlM0RDQVUmaG89aHR0cHMlM0ElMkYlMkZlbmNyeXB0ZWQtdGJuMC5nc3RhdGljLmNvbSZzPTYwNiZoPWU3NzNhYTkwODZkNmE4OWQwMWU0ZjZkODk0ODU1ZWEyZDIzMmU3YTYyNzJjYTU3Mzk3MmI0NmQ0NjAxMDY3YzMmc2l6ZT05ODB4JmM9MjQ3NDg5MDE0MiIsImV4cGlyZXNfYXQiOjE2NzAzMzU0NjB9.iqCUfvVUI22AGAz-QYPiS7XFb26sw3mGaU8seorLqxQ/img.jpg" id="44f84" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="cbdc9b0cdf21d3873eef2a40647ae810" alt="Freck Beauty logo" />Freck Beauty
<p><a href="https://freckbeauty.com/" target="_blank">Freck Beauty</a> manufactures beauty products intended to make the user feel seen. Remi Brixton, the company's chief executive officer, founded the startup in 2015 when she was in search of a freckle makeup product. When she couldn't find one, she launched her own, the FRECK OG. The East Los Angeles-based company raised an undisclosed amount of seed funding in a deal led by KarpReilly and Stage 1 Fund earlier this year.</p>The Skills
<p><a href="https://www.theskills.com/" target="_blank">The Skills</a> wants to be the <a href="https://dot.la/the-skills-2649267338.html" target="_self">master class on sports </a>and life. The Los Angeles-based startup launched two months ago and offers classes from gold medal Olympians — including swimmer Michael Phelps and volleyball player Kerri Walsh Jennings — and Grand Slam tennis Champion Maria Sharapova. In December, it closed a $5 million seed round backed by Boston-based Will Ventures, Global Founders Capital, 8VC, Maveron, Hack VC and Correlation VC.</p>Mapped
<p>Founded by Shaun Cooley, former chief technology officer of Cisco's Internet-of-Things (IoT) and Industries division, <a href="https://www.mapped.com/" target="_blank">Mapped</a> provides IoT services in El Segundo.</p><p>The company raised $3 million of seed funding in a deal led by Greycroft earlier this year, putting its pre-money valuation at $9 million. </p>DataPlor
<p>Created in 2016 by Geoffrey Michener, <a href="https://www.dataplor.com/" target="_blank">Dataplor</a> indexes micro-businesses in Mexico (and will soon be expanding to other countries in Central and South America) and sells the data to larger companies.The company relies on contractors in those countries to collect the information from local businesses. It raised $4 million from ff Venture Capital, Quest Venture Partners and Space Capital earlier this year and expects to use it to expand into more Latin American countries. </p>Grow Credit
<p>Launched by serial entrepreneur <a href="https://joebayen.medium.com/a-black-founders-guide-to-raising-a-2m-institutional-seed-round-a8687f95087f" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Joe Bayen</a>, <a href="https://growcredit.com/" target="_blank">Grow Credit</a> helps customers improve their credit score by providing credit for subscription services like Netflix and Spotify. Their MasterCard can help consumers with thin or damaged credit scores and the small line of credit can be upgraded for a fee. The company closed a $2 million seed round earlier this year with participation from Mucker Labs.</p>Outer
<p>The two-year-old Santa Monica-based company has seen business boom during the pandemic as retail stores shut down and online orders surged. The direct-to-consumer outdoor furniture brand <a href="https://dot.la/outer-furniture-raise-2646187491.html" data-linked-post="2646187491" target="_blank">uses backyards as showrooms</a> and <a href="https://dot.la/how-outer-aims-to-disrupt-the-outdoor-furniture-industry-2647872107.html" data-linked-post="2647872107" target="_blank">raised $4.3 million in a seed round</a> earlier this year led by Mucker Capital. Founded by Jake Liu and Terry Lin, a former designer at Pottery Barn, <a href="https://liveouter.com/" target="_blank">Outer</a> aims to appeal to Restoration Hardware and Pottery Barn shoppers. </p>WhatNot
<p>A livestreaming reseller of collectibles like FunkoPop vinyl figurines, Pokémon cards and sports cards, <a href="https://www.whatnot.com/" target="_blank">WhatNot</a> taps into a growing retail trend and promises that the collectibles are verified, much like sneaker reseller GOAT. </p><p>The startup secured $4 million in seed funding this month from Scribble Ventures, Wonder Ventures, Operator Partners, Y Combinator, Liquid 2 Ventures, Twenty Two Ventures and other investors. The company plans to use the funds to expand into video games, comics books, designer toys and vintage fashion.</p>Fourthwall
<p><a href="https://fourthwall.com/" target="_blank">Fourthwall</a> is the developer of an internet platform that helps content creators launch fully-branded websites focused on interacting with fans. Their website tag phrase is "Make a living doing what you love," which is complemented by their model, which provides creators 100% ownership of their website and brand.</p><p>Founded by Walker Williams and Will Baumann, the company has raised $4 million to date, from investors Defy Partners, Lightspeed Venture Partners and Initialized Capital Management.</p>Shop LatinX
<p><a href="https://shoplatinx.com/" target="_blank">Shop LatinX</a> calls itself the "leading beauty, fashion, and lifestyle ecommerce designed by and made for Latinas." The brainchild of two Los-Angeles-based Latinas, Brittany Chavez and Raquel Garcia <a href="https://dot.la/techstars-la-2646304264.html" data-linked-post="2646304264" target="_blank">launched their website</a> before Black Friday in 2016. It features more than 200 brands.</p>First Resonance
<p>Founded by former SpaceX software engineer Karan Talati and Neal Sarraf, <a href="https://www.firstresonance.io/" target="_blank">First Resonance</a> promises to ease the workflow for manufactures with software intended to provide greater visibility into production and test product development lifecycle. The company raised $1.75 million of seed funding last year from Wavemaker Partners, Stage Venture Partners and PLG Ventures, among clothes.</p>Vurbl
<p><a href="https://vurbl.com/" target="_blank">Vurbl</a> offers curated, one-stop-shop of what it calls the best audio on the internet, which can include podcasts but also goes well beyond that from religious sermons to court arguments. The new platform founded by CEO Audra Gold is being built with the <a href="https://dot.la/vurbl-raises-1-3-million-to-build-the-youtube-of-audio-2647713757.html" target="_self">$1.3 million pre-seed round Vurbl closed in September</a> led by AlphaEdison with participation from Halogen Ventures and Ten13.</p>PocketWatch
<p>Former Disney executive Chris Williams founded <a href="https://pocket.watch/" target="_blank">the studio</a> that produces family-focused content from YouTube stars. This year it launched clock.work, an advertising agency designed to help major brands reach kids. Investors include Viacom, Greycroft, Third Wave Digital and United Talent Agency, along with strategic angels including Robert Downey Jr. and Jon Landau.</p>PocketList
<p><a href="https://pocketlist.app/" target="_blank">The app</a> allows renters to see and share apartments that will soon be available before they're listed — reducing the time properties sit vacant and potentially heating up competition among apartment hunters. It launched <a href="https://dot.la/renter-app-2646416605.html" data-linked-post="2646416605" target="_blank">earlier this year</a>. The company has $2.8 million in seed funding led by David Sacks' Craft Ventures along with Abstract VC, Wonder Ventures and angel investor Spencer Rascoff, co-founder of Zillow and dot.LA.</p>Quilt
<p>The audio-based social platform promises to be the spot for "live, supportive, feel good conversations—just like hopping on the phone with a friend when you need it most." It lets people start a conversation around any topic or join by listening. <a href="https://www.beta.wearequilt.com/" target="_blank">Quilt</a> raised an undisclosed amount of venture funding from Freestyle Capital in 2019.</p>Tonebase
<p>Founded by Abhi Nayar, Chris Garwood and Igor Licthmann, <a href="https://www.tonebase.co/" target="_blank">Tonebase</a> provides high-level music education online. Yale School of Music alumnus Garwood and Lichtman<a href="https://news.yale.edu/2018/01/22/first-person-how-we-are-bringing-high-level-music-education-masses" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer"> told their alma mater that it built with the idea </a>that it was "a way for people everywhere to learn from the very best musicians around the world — individuals who, due to their busy performing and teaching careers, are traditionally accessible to only a select few." The company has raised an undisclosed amount from Launch fund, e.ventures and other undisclosed last May. </p>Second Spectrum
<p>Launched in 2013 by Jeff Su, Yu-Han Chang and Rajiv Maheswaran, <a href="https://www.secondspectrum.com/index.html" target="_blank">Second Spectrum</a> already has deals with the NBA and English Premier League. This year it scored another one with Major League Soccer to use its optical tracking system to evaluate and analyze performance. </p><p>Second Spectrum puts their tracking cameras inside the stadium. Machine learning and AI-powered analytics provide detailed data that helps coaches and others better understand the game from player speed and deceleration to shot velocity in near real time. That technology can also be used on broadcast platforms to give fans more insight. The company raised about $20 million backed by CAA Ventures, Raine Ventures and The Chernin Group in 2018.</p>Toucan
<p>Founded by CEO Taylor Nieman, Shaun Merritt and Brandon Dietz, <a href="https://dot.la/slingshot-aerospace-ceo-2646797521.html" data-linked-post="2646797521" target="_blank">Toucan</a> is a Chrome browser extension that lets people learn a new language. It scans websites you visit and translates some words into the language you want to learn. The Santa Monica-based company most recently raised a $3 million round backed by GSV Ventures, Amplifyher Ventures, and Wonder Ventures, among others. </p>Serve Automation
<p>Created by former SpaceX engineers, <a href="https://serveautomation.com/" target="_blank">Serve Automation</a> aims to change the way foods get delivered. It has secured $7 million in a seed round and is operating in stealth mode. </p>- Meet 3 Early Stage Science Startups at First Look's Showcase - dot.LA ›
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